POLICE LOGS

Grocery Store Robbery

Bell's Grocery Store reported 20 grocery carts stolen from their premises at 2:00 A.M. Wednesday morning.

Store security guard, Gregory Muser, called in the complaint after witnessing a disguised man running away with the stolen property. "I chased after him, but all of a sudden he turned a corner and was just gone. How the heck does a guy disappear with 20 shopping carts? It kinda freaked me out."

The grocery carts were reported to have an estimated value of $120 each. If anyone has any leads as to the whereabouts of the missing carts, please call the local police station.

Noise Complaint

Police responded to a noise complaint on Tuesday evening at 72 Jackson Street. Sandra Jankins, 94, called 911 after she says she heard a low bass registering from a passing car outside her window, disturbing her sleep.

After arriving at the scene, police said they found no car or motorist with loud bass noises coming from their vehicle. Jankins claimed that "hip-hop, hooligans and a break-down of our American principles were to blame."

Stolen CDs

Sarah Edmunts, of 544 Holly Lane, reported her CDs stolen from her vehicle at 8 P.M. on Tuesday evening. Police arrived on the scene to find her car window smashed.

Edmunts claims her book of CDs were valued at three thousand dollars. After stifling their laughter, the police took the report and issued a curfew for the neighborhood.

Public Urination

Police arrested Gary Draket, 42, of Gibsonwich after several motorists reported that Drake was standing in the middle of traffic with a shopping cart. When police arrived on the scene and stopped traffic, Drake was making engine noises with his mouth, pretending the grocery cart was a vehicle and urinating on himself. Police said they smelled alcohol on his breath.

Police have no idea what to charge him with, but are thinking about starting with drunk driving, theft and public urination. The cart was not one of the 20 stolen from Bell's grocery store earlier that week.